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Dear future me: Get better at talking to people, be more supportive, and understanding. Don’t push people away because of judgement. Posses an open mind and never look back unless it’s positive. Keep the past in the past, don't let it determine your future.

Dear past me: Why the hell were you so vunerable? I brought all of my issues upon myself and caused more controversy within my own mind. I never listened to anybody’s opinion on my situation and ended up looking like an idiot. I could say I’ve learned.

Dear family: You guys are goobers. I love you guys so much even though you irk me to the point of isolation 24/7. Whatevs. You guys are fantastic.

Dear boyfriend: Lol huh?

Dear ex-boyfriend: I hope you understand i have to do what’s best for me & my future, not you & your feelings.

Dear crush: I see good things in the future. Take it slow, and we’ll narrow it like a 3 pointer at the buzzer.

Dear friends: You guys are a second family. I mean come on. You don’t find these guys anywhere else. I couldn’t be more lucky. I love each and every one of them even though we all get annoyed with each other. I would be an awkward loser without you guys and love the crazy, random things we do. Even though we have all gone forward in life, regardless of what happens, we are still always here for each other. That's love.

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I love being able to feel him breath and I love when he wraps his arms around me. It makes me feel whole and just warm inside. I always just want to grab his hands and hold them, I love his hands and I love when he smiles at me, I fucking adore his smile. I can’t even explain how much it warms up my heart just to see him smile at me, it’s so adorable. In general he’s just fucking adorable. Despite what he says I love his body, I love his heart, I love his mind everything.

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Dear Me,

There’s a lot of things I can change about myself, I’m totally completely insecure, and I feel really out of place. I wish I could find a way to get out of this mess, like just do anything to be happy again, at least the least bit. just a short time ago, I felt amazing, like I was flying, then I hit the ground, but even harder than when I crashed before. But the darkness though, it’s kinda taken over in a sense, like, what would it feel like to be happy? The sadness is like an addiction, who would I be without it? It’s just a part of me now, and that’s who I am. I can totally play it off like nothing’s wrong in public, but isn’t anybody noticing that just maybe I look a little down? No. I’m invisible, no one notices an outcast like me while they’re all too wrapped up in their own good time. I just wanna let the light back in, but I’m hoping I can pull the shit out of me, and do what I oughta.

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Key Ingredients of a Healthy Relationship.

Consideration: Am I mindful of the other person’s needs? Am I mindful of my own needs? How mindful is this person to my needs?

Personal Integrity: To what degree am I able to maintain my integrity when I am relating with and to this individual? To what degree does this person maintain and/or compromise his/her integrity?

Compatibility: What do I have in common with this individual? To what degree do we like and dislike the same things, share the same attitudes, values, and beliefs? How important to me are our similarities and our differences?

Communication: Are we able to talk freely about issues that are important in our relationship? Are we able to understand each others thoughts and feelings? Do es our relationship become stronger as a result of communicating our thoughts and feelings?

Honesty: Is this relationship built on truth or are there games and hidden agendas?

Acceptance: Am I accepted and appreciated for who I am? Do I accept and appreciate the other person for who they are? Are we trying to convince or change each other into someone else?

Trust: How trustworthy is this person? To what degree am I willing to let this person gain access to the private things about me that I don’t want everyone to know?’

Respect: Am I treated as if I have value in this relationship? Do I treat the other person as if they have value?

Empathy: To what degree does this person attempt to understand (not necessarily agree) with what I am feeling? To what degree am I able to understand the feelings of this person?

Understanding: Does this person understand what I mean by what I say and do? How much do I understand the thoughts and behaviors of this person?

Vulnerability: How safe do I feel letting down my barriers with this person? To what degree am I willing to let this person affect my feelings?

Maturity: To what extent does this person recognize his/her non-working patterns of thinking, feeling an behaving? What have they done to identify or change non-working patterns? To what extent does this person hold themselves and others accountable for their choices? How empowered is this person to create their own life?

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I know God has a huge plan for me, I can feel it
My love is so pure, how can any man not see it
How can a man not see how far I’ll go to be that one?

Watching myself fall and get up,
It’s hard because I’m falling on my own,
The man I want won’t come to my aide,

My knight doesn’t show, doesn’t call, text or anything
To treat someone like this and to say you love them
God if that’s love, spare my heart from further things

I shall be here by myself, and build the pure love I need
My bond is unquestionable and is something even I am scared of
I’m a strong woman that will restore & become something dangerous.

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